Worrisome Soul & A Broken Promise

I don't even know where to start or how to start writing this post. My thoughts and emotions are still very messy in my mind. I guess I'll just write this. I can't say its not personal cause its every bit personal.

It all started when my baby went out to eat supper with a friend of ours. In fact, the whole day I was feeling as though something bad was on the horizon but I couldn't tell what it was. Not to mention for a week now that I feel the fear of losing my baby. At the spur of the moment, it didn't make any sense, till when my baby went out for supper with a friend of ours in Sunway.

After supper, out of the blue, they were near Liquid and my baby asked if they could go and have a look since our friend hasn't been there for a long time now. I said yes but I felt as though the answer was forced out of my finger smsing him. I said it unwillingly and from then on, it was a restless night for me. Paranoia settled in, I couldn't concentrate to do anything and I was worried... Worried bad things may happen or regretful things may happen to my baby.

So where does the broken promise in the title comes in? Well Our friend promised that we as in me, Mc Dave and him will go to Liquid TOGETHER. As you can see, that was not the case. There are very few things that I despise and this happened to be one of them. Am I to say no to Mc Dave when he asked? I could but I didn't cause my baby is free to do anything he wishes. But bottomline is that the promise which was made was broken when our friend suggested to go.

One very curious thing though, how did they end up near Liquid when my baby lives near Bangsar? Isn't Bangsar in between of the two places? Forgive my rudeness here but who in their rat's ass mind would bring or even consider to bring MY BF to a gay club?! Especially considering that I have not been there myself and that the promise was to go TOGETHER...

Once a promise is made, you honour it even though it'll cost you your life. You're better off dead than to break a promise.

Oh gosh... I sound like a psycho and paranoid BF but hey, I'm looking out for my relationship with my BF and me. I trust him with all my heart but others can hardly be trusted. What can I say, its a vicious world out there. I don't know what is your purpose to bring him there in the first place without me. I don't know your intentions. I'm trying to protect us so I can't help but feel threaten and paranoid.

This would be my second outbreak of emotions but first at being a paranoid. Guess this is what love can do to a person. Sigh. Nothing is simple is there...

-Live Long & Prosper