The Year That Was 2008

2008 was quite a year and it went by in a blink of an eye. I dare to say that 2008 is the year that I started to grow up. My life as a student ended upon my graduation and the road to adulthood, career, taxes, paychecks and bills opened up to me. It's a good trade off for me. Sure there's less responsibilities and more time to myself when I was a student but there's just so much more as an adult.

You win some you lose some, that's how it is.

Getting a job means I have to move to where the job is and that is Sarawak. Living by my own and being independent is not foreign to me. Been doing that since young so moving from West Malaysia to East Malaysia was almost a seamless transition. Sure I miss KL, my friends and all but a man got to do what a man got to do.

Then of course, there's my breakup with McDave, second and final breakup. As painful as the experience was, it was necessary for me to learn about myself and relationship. No better teacher than pain and experience. We're still friends and that's the best result I can hope for in a breakup.

As 2008 was about to end, I met an amazing guy in our annual Christmas party hosted by none other than Dr. Paul. We hit it off in less than 48 hours, that gave a whole new meaning to living on the fast lane. Never have I had such affair happened to me before. Seriously, less than 48 hours. We'll see where things lead and take it easy and slow. However, lots of drama went along with my encounter. Rocked the boat quite violently more like it.

What a year 2008 was and went with a bang it did. I'm looking forward what 2009 brings.

You know you love me.
XOXO
Queer Ranter

25th December 2008

Two open houses, several shots of alcohol (Smirnoff, Tuak and Gin) and few hours of housekeeping later, I'm now in the airport waiting for my flight back to KL. Curse AirAsia counter rejected my check in after half an hour of queuing in line. "I'm sorry, we can only check you in in forty minutes time." says the woman while smiling. I hate it when they smile cause I can't verbally abuse them for making me wait longer.

So here I am, eating my club sandwich and a big mug of hot hazelnut chocolate. I'm a victim to Starbucks... Did I ever mentioned how nice and friendly the people in Starbucks are?! Just a moment ago, the person who took my orders stood next to where I'm sitting and had a decent long chat. Gosh no wonder I love coming to this place. Coffee Beans on the other hand seriously needs some sort of customer service boot camp. Desperately in need of that...

Anyhows, enough about Starbucks and the retarded-uncongenial-customer-service that is Coffee Beans.

Back to the open houses that I went for during the day. Never did go for open houses for Christmas before this. But going with three Muslim friends, there's a price to pay. People here drink a lot. Like really DRINK a lot! Alcohol is cheap here because of the alcohol smuggling. So since they can't drink, I have to drink on their behalf... It was afternoon and I was struggling to keep my mind thinking straight. I am not going to be known as "The Drunken Stupor Boy" on top of my "Pretty Boy" tittle.

It was a good Christmas I say despite being drunk in the afternoon. I am never drinking in the afternoon. It's just weird being hammered while the sun is still up.

How was your Christmas?

You know you love me.
XOXO
Queer Ranter

The Five

On the fifth day of Christmas my true love sent to me, Five Golden Ring~~~ Four Calling Birds, Three French Hens, Two Turtle Doves and A partridge in a pear tree. Alright, it's not anywhere near Christmas but it's Christmas "T Minus One" Day. Good enough to start singing Christmas Carols.

But the disturbing fact is, malls have started selling Chinese New Year decorative and playing Chinese New Year songs. Christmas isn't even here yet and they just shove it aside? Poor Christmas. No matter, I'm flying back to KL tomorrow night arriving 10 minutes before Christmas ends. Sad I know but at least I'm back.

Christmas equates to parties and parties equates vices, lots of vices. As much as I would dearly love to share with my readers all my vices so that they can take full advantage of me, I'm just going to share five.

Uno: Stuffed Toys

Not just any stuffed toys. They must be absolutely adorable in my eyes and furs that won't fall. Fallen furs make me sneeze. A lot...

Dos: Underwear

Never seem to have enough of them to the point of I'm spoilt with options. Every morning will be spent matching underwear with outfit.

Tres: Electrical Gadgets

Any electronic gadgets that's portable, multi purpose and chic. Hence the emotional need for a SE Xperia.

Cuatro: Internet

The Internet is for porn. The Internet is for porn. Yes the Internet is for porn. Well maybe just a little or a lot depending on how you look at my Internet surfing behavior. Whatever the use, deviant or otherwise, I can't live without it. It's my life line.

Cinco: Youthful Looking Guys

Most of you may have noticed my preference in youthful looking guys say Lee Hom or some of the bloggers here itself (you know who you are). It's youthful looking guys and not younger guys. Age is not much of a factor just how a person looks. But of course this is purely for the pleasure viewing purposes.

So there, my five vices.

You know you love me.
XOXO
Queer Ranter

Drill Sergeant Turned Blonde

I have to start my post with a little character sketch of my mentor at work. She's a person who's straight to the point, do this do that and I want it done yesterday. She doesn't greet like every other people in the office does instead she says "What are you doing? Why are you idle?". Keeping to the tradition of their company, slave drive your employee for every drip of their worth. The equivalent of Emperor Shi Huang Ti building the Great Wall of China.

Well that was few months ago, things are rather different now. It's no secret that she's dating someone. In fact, it's a public knowledge and constant discussions of who this mystery guy is. Whoever he is, we are indebted to him. Work is less Spartan military like and she seems happier, less shuddery (not that I was ever intimidated by her to begin with). Rather she's become more warm and friendly. A laughter from her was like the search for immortality but these days it's a common sound.

She is highly knowledgeable in the oil and gas field and has memory like an elephant. Instant absorption and locked tight in her mind. I wish I have her capabilities. It'd make my work so much easier not having to dig up for references... Ask her anything and she can answer (though most of the time she makes us dig for the answer ourselves...). Basically, she knows her theoretical stuff inside out.

First it was the noticeable laughter from her, her friendliness and warmth. It was hard to believe at first but people change don't they? So we let it be and embrace the new her. Then an unforeseen, out of the blue thing occurred. Life sure does have it's puckish sense of humour.

She pulled a "I'm blonde" stunt.

She and my supervisor were having a lengthy discussion. At one point she got all confused and just blurted, "I'm sorry, you have to speak to me slowly. I'm blonde."

If that's not a 180 degree flip, I don't know what is.

You know you love me.
XOXO
Queer Ranter

Balls Balls Balls

Glutinous rice balls that is in conjunction to the Winter Solstice celebration. I've always been a fan of tang yuan (汤圆). So simple yet so delicious and comforting to eat. Good balance of the sugary sweet and spicy ginger in the soup compliments the plain taste of the glutinous rice balls.

My family isn't one of those that practises Chinese celebration such as this so it came to me as a shocked when my housemates made tang yuan yesterday. I didn't know it was yesterday specifically and I've never made them before too. Never knew it was so simple to make and well it was fun. I can see how it can bring the whole family together. Sit around the table, chatting while rolling up the glutinous rice balls.

Little white and pink balls of joy.

My housemates invited some of their friends over to make and eat tang yuan. It was a nice small gathering. Lots of laughter and story telling. It brings warmth and joy to this house that we rent. As much as I love my peacefulness and serenity, it doesn't hurt to have some racket to liven things up a little. I'm not that antisocial when I'm at home.

Happy Winter Solstice everyone.

And guess what, Chinese New Year is only a month away. 

You know you love me.
XOXO
Queer Ranter

Starbuck Junkie

Never thought I'd see the day but I've turned into one of those Starbucks junkie... Yes there is one Starbucks in Miri. Make that two, one in the city and one in the airport. It has suddenly become my favourite place to be. The seat by the window is just fabulous. I can sit there for hours with my laptop surfing away and sipping a Venti Dark Cherry Mocha Frappuccino.

I don't so much love their drinks but I love their merchandise! I went crazy with their 10th Anniversary merchandise, 2009 Planner/Diary and a Venti sized Starbucks Tumbler. I've got the both of them too. I absolutely adore the Planner/Diary. It's so pretty. Leather bound and the paper is lovely. I can't bring myself to write on it especially with my hideous handwriting...

Signs of an addict, Starbucks Merchandise...

I spent the whole of Saturday studying and half of it was in Starbucks. Towards the afternoon, my room was too hot to be conducive for studying and I needed to pick up my Starbucks Tumbler anyways. Why not enjoy the aircon there, to be seen and people watch while studying (chatting, surfing, blogging) eh?

Disappointingly, there was only one eye candy spotted. Sad... At least he's got a real cute bubble butt! One curious thing that I saw was camo mini skirts... Two girls came into Starbucks wearing those. Thank goodness they we're trying to pull a "harujuku" look or I might just scream. I don't like "harujuku" girls... There was a boy, very good complexion and fair but unfortunately dyed his hair blond. That kinda ruined everything about him. Why do they do that to themselves?

Other than that, I managed to cover quite a lot of my study material.

Window side view.

Sitting by the window is really nice. There's something about looking passersby that's calming to me. But something unexpected happened when I was looking out at one of them. A girl in the car smiled and waved at me while I was sipping my drink. I was unsure if it was to me or to someone behind me that she was waving. I just smiled and waved back anyways.

It was a good day for me.

You know you love me.
XOXO
Queer Ranter

Tis The Season To Be Gay

Some of you may have seen it, some of you may have not. Either one, it's a great video to watch especially the upcoming celebration Christmas~~~ I certainly can't stop watching and giggling along the way.


Merry Christmas~~~

Gosh the guy in black tank top and the guy with scarf and hood are so adorable!

With just five more days to go, I can't wait to get on a plane and head on home! That's right boys and boys, QR is going to paint the city of KL pink once more. Market Place, here I come!

You know you love me.
XOXO
Queer Ranter

What's In The Yellow Box?

Offshore is all about the bold, bright and neon colour coding for good safety reasons. It's easier for rescue choppers or planes to spot something in middle of deep blue ocean that is searing bright such as yellow. Hence why platforms are painted brightly.

Conditions offshore can be quite severe although I'll admit not as extreme like the North Sea but still winds go up to 40 nautical knots per hour (73 km/hr) or faster. Weather change pretty drastically in an instant. I barely walk straight these winds. So equipments kept solid steel boxes like these.

Hard, strong and sturdy box.

But this box is not used to keep equipments. It has a more sinister purpose, pollute the sea. Yes it pollutes the sea with biological wastes. Sure, biological is biodegradable but it's still pollution. As much as we try to prevent pollution from crude spillage, this is unavoidable. This is why.

A hole!?

This box is the offshore version of a toilet. It's just you, the wind and the deep blue sea down below. Oh and not forgetting schools of fishes happily swimming and feeding on these biological wastes. It's not mystery why they're all so huge and fresh out in the sea. They're all well fed.

Of course this is not the same facility on a living quarters platform. Proper toilet and good living condition there unlike production platforms such as these. For what it's worth to those who ate fish for dinner last night, I never take a dump in these boxes. I make sure I'm good before leaving the living quarters. 

You know you love me.
XOXO
Queer Ranter

It's A Hard Knock Life

The next time you guys fill your petrol tanks in a petrol station, remember the sacrifices the people in the oil and gas industry make to give the general public fuel.


You know you love me.
XOXO
Queer Ranter

Bring Your Readers To Work Day!

Fact one. I work in the oil and gas industry. Fact two. I'm highly desirable when I'm in a company of men in the middle of the sea. Fact three. I'm just bloody gorgeous. Ok fine, fact two and fact three are just wishful thinking (though is it so bad for it to be true?).

I've been talking about my trips offshore and things happening in the middle of the sea but no photo to speak of to show all my readers. Well the other place of work besides the office. The office is boring and nothing interesting to see unlike the offshore platform.

To those who've been wondering what it looks like, this is it.


This is one of the three installations offshore. Pretty cool huh? Unfortunately, there's no scale to compare it with but it's not big neither is it small. If you can squint your eyes on one of the bridges and you'll see a white box. That white box is your normal 15 footer container. So just imagine a little how big or small it is.

On the left is what we call a drilling platform. See the bundle of pipes rising upwards to the platform? Those come from many thousands feet underneath the seabed. Then the middle module is where the pumps are to pump the crude to other facilities and shore. Then the right module houses compressors and separators.

Sure is awesome working in an installation such as this. I actually love coming offshore. Lots of things to learn, people are nice, free workout (see how much stairs I have to climb?!) and food is free (though not that good but it'll do)! There's on exception to this seemingly perfect workplace. My skin gets ravaged by the elements!

UV rays~~~ Go away~~~

I'm in such desperate need for Biotherm... Or Lab Series...

Sponsors anyone? Please?

You know you love me.
XOXO
Queer Ranter

I Was Not Made To Study

Ever since my uni days, I noticed something. Studying makes me hungry! So hungry it's fungry (farking hungry) almost borderline I'm-going-to-die starvation. It's annoying because every half an hour or so, starvation kicks in and a growling symphony is projected from my stomach...

How am I suppose to finish 350++ worth of materials on time?!

At least I have two cartons of low fat milk I nicked off from offshore to quiet my stomach down. Though I only discovered I had those milk after munching on quarter of my favourite Julie's Peanutbutter Biscuits...

Eeeeeeeeee fats~~~ Go away~~~

I really don't know how those bookworms study from dawn to dusk. Don't they get hungry like me too? And where did they get their attention span tweaked to focus for hours on end! I can't help but look into my blog or Facebook every five seconds!

Help~~~

You know you love me.
XOXO
Queer Ranter

Obsession With Bananas

There's many "firsts" in this blog. One of them is the unforgettable sexcapade trilogy posts that I wrote long time ago. And recently, I put up photos of me on this blog too but as I started working, I took them down. I'm in the wrong "cuntry" to be freely queer. As they say, "When in Rome, do as the Romans do".

This will be my first angry post. I'm a very docile and tolerant person but there are two things that will just make me snap and hell has no fury like Queer Ranter's scorn, queer men in denial starts a family while the other is the word "banana". I'll be ranting about the latter.

Banana. Such a good source of nutrient and energy (good for other uses, mainly in the DIY department) turned into an annoyance whenever I hear it. Banana is a euphemism for Chinese people who either can't speak, read, write or all of the above. How did they come up with such fabulously degrading term? Chinese are naturally born with a tinge of yellow. So like a banana, yellow on the outside and white on the inside. White refers to Western upbringing.

I always get this "banana" whenever I meet "Chinese Educated" people and honestly, it's getting into my nerves. I'm really not bothered about this "banana" crap but there's always a limit to everything.

I've gotten statements such as these:

Statement 1: Ah?! You're don't know how to read and write Chinese? Such a shame to the Chinese race.

Statement 2: Oh don't speak to me in Mandarin. Your Mandarin is appalling. I've scored 'A' for my Mandarin in STPM you know. Better stick to English.

When I first heard Statement 1, I was shocked. These people still exists?! So what if I can't read and write Mandarin? I manage to survive with my English and basic Mandarin. There's no fatal need for me to master Mandarin in my field of work either. Everything is still following American Standards and it's not going to change to Chinese Standards and only printed in Mandarin. As to shame, I wonder who is ashamed of who. She of me for my inability to read and write Mandarin or myself for being Chinese and related to insensitive and racist person like her.

Statement 2 was even more of a shocker to me purely because it came from a person I know. I am deeply disappointed in her and I hold a grudge on that incident. Hence, I've been consciously keeping a distant from her and I'll just leave it as that until I'm ready to tell her about. I am at the moment comfortable having the grudge as company. Misery loves company after all.

What is so great about being able to speak, read and write Mandarin? Why is there a need to emphasise and ostracise me for my inability to master Mandarin? What's with the I-Know-Mandarin-And-You-Don't pride? Rather childish really. Never for once did I ever pick on them for their atrocious command in English. Instead I offer my assistance.

I don't give a rat's ass if you master Mandarin or master any other language cause it's got no business with me. You know it, good for you but don't expect me to give you a golden star when you brag about it and belittle me. Like I said, I don't give a rat's ass about it.

Lemme say this ONCE. It is extremely rude to ask anyone if they're a "banana". It's like asking an orphan "do you have parents?". Does it matter if the person you meet is a "banana"?

You know you love me.
XOXO
Queer Ranter

Paintball or Painball?

All of us have some sort of sadomasochism tendencies deep down inside. I'll admit, I do like to spice it up a little when it comes to rampant bed activities, just a little. I'm rather kinky when it comes to these things but I'm sure you guys already know that. No harm so long as both parties are having a good time and be safe.

That aside, I've found paintball to be the perfect outlet (outside of the bedroom) for my inner-sadomasochism-self. Paintball! Though it should be called painball cause it hurts like a bitch when you get shot at from a distant and at 10 feet or less, a shot on naked skin will cause minor bleeding... The pallet (bullets) flies through the atmosphere at an average velocity of 250 ft/sec. That translates to major pain.

Despite having participated in paintball previously, I still got shot, got shot many times and I have the bruises as evidence!

Left arm casualty.

Right arm casualty.

Hurts like a bitch! Urgh.

I find a part of the pre-match briefing hilarious yet disturbing.

The Marshal said, "Now when you get shot, raise your hand, shout "OUT" and walk to the trees. Even when you have surrendered, your friends will keep barraging you with pallets until he realises that you have surrendered. So be patient. Enjoy the game and enjoy the pain.".

Barrage of pallets did come my way several times... I did manage to pull off dodging bullets ala The Matrix but not when there's several people shooting at me. Instead you had me screaming, "Ouch my arm! Arrrgh my other arm. Wei my tits! Hey, I surrender! Dem it that was my BUTT!".

But all is fair when it comes to paintball. I did get several people but I feel for one of my victim. Shot him straight on his chest and leaving a bruise next to his heart. Unfortunate for him, his vest failed him and the pallet contacted on his naked skin. No pain no glory right?

I think I'm fast becoming a fan of paintball but I don't have the funds for it at the moment. Gonna get myself SE Xperia first then I shall consider joining the local paintball club.

You know you love me.
XOXO
Queer Ranter

Don't Be Silly, These Too

I have been Emily Charlton-ed (think The Devil Wears Prada) by my supervisor at work. I was given materials related to my training to learn. I don't mind studying. In fact I welcome it. There's just so many things that I need to learn and best start with the fundamentals since I've been exposed to practicals and field work. Learning never ceases.

The first hint of her pulling of an Emily Charlton was Saturday. I should have known judging from the emails she sent to all of us in the team on a Saturday morning. Gosh this woman is not human. Bionic would be an understatement and robotic just doesn't cut it. Who sends email on a Saturday morning?! But silly me, I replied to her emails. I was up and felt obligated.

We were discussing about the materials for me to learn. So come this week, I was handed those materials. Then she said, "We'll have a test next week. Finish studying the ROLL (I have no idea what this stands for...) modules.". I agreed to it, well I doubt that was negotiable. Gosh I barely started and she's already talking about testing me...

Little did I realise the gravity of the situation. I mean, how hard is it to study for it and take the test? I've been doing it for 17 years and I did alright. So I asked my friend what's this ROLL is all about. Fundamentals this, basics that and principles whatever. Hmmm, seems alright. Then I popped the million dollar question, "How much of material is it?". 7 modules with an average of 50 pages per module...

Such an Emily-Andrea scene:

Emily: Right, these are all of the guests. Miranda invites everyone and we have to make sure they all think that she knows exactly who they are and I've been studying for weeks.

Andrea: I have to learn all these by tonight?

Emily: Now don't be silly Andrea, these too.

I'm screwed!

Does she think I have nothing else to do but study?! Gosh there goes my weekend! Guess that's why they're good at what they do. I shall persevere cause daddy needs a SonyEricsson Xperia!

You know you love me.
XOXO
Queer Ranter

Say My Name

I'm a big believer in the power of names even more so when it comes to Chinese names. If you're a skeptic, try calling a person idiot instead of addressing his name. With enough time, he'll most probably believe he's an idiot. This is why we have so many low morale, low self esteemed and suicidal people. The power of names is not something to be discredited though of course that's not the sole reason why. Take it, like everything else with a pinch of salt.

Back to names, I really like my name both English (many people confuse this with Christian name and think I'm a Christian...) and Chinese name. I believe my straightforwardness in my manner and speech is credited to my English name. Ask any one of my friends about it and they'll agree, I hope. Straightforwardness does come with a price. I tend to say things other people wouldn't say. Not in a mean way but in a strange way like talking about nocturnal emissions to random guy that I just met.

Yea go figure.

My Chinese name translates to pride of the family. Well I'm not sure if I'm pride-of-the-family material but I sure have Queer Pride in me with loads to share. Hehehhe. Neither am I much of a family guy at the moment either. Perhaps when I settle down with someone I will.

Maybe my belief in the influence of name made me all fascinated to know the full name of everyone I meet. Gives me a peek into the person's character.

What does your name say about you?

You know you love me.
XOXO
Queer Ranter

Festive Mood

Tis the season to be jolly and marry and gay. I'm ecstatic that I'm going back to KL on Christmas day. Albeit arriving in LCCT just 10 minutes before 26th midnight (the things I do for cheap flights), I'm still I'm happy about heading back to civilization. Initially I didn't plan on coming back. Was thinking I'll just wait till February.

Then I started thinking about the clubbing. KL will literally be deserted and that translates to no crowd in clubs. I can't have no crowd in clubs! Better club for Christmas and New Year when the crowd is at it's most crowded. So I took my leave from my many days of unrecorded leaves (it is estimated to be 14 days) and bought my flight ticket.

Things to do when I get back. Meet up with friends of course! Shop till I drop. I'm have a need to shop for chic office wear. I'm thinking of hunting for a pair of nice sunnies too. Clubbing all night long! Have good food, I'm deprived of good food here.

With only 15 days till departure, how do I concentrate on my work? It's not helping that half the office is empty and it's bloody freezing as well. I can't help but daydream about my trip to KL. Space out into twilight with the thoughts of shopping.

P.S. My office computer is acting all weird. Turning itself on and off... Annoying...

You know you love me.
XOXO
Queer Ranter

Why Don't You Call?

I get this question quite often. Why don't you call? It's not that I deliberately avoid contact with my fellow friends, it's just how I am. I'm accustomed in being alone, doing my own things and get wrapped up in my own world. More often than not, I'm preoccupied with my day to day activities that I don't really think of anything else.

As cold as it sounds, it's not intentional. I don't knowingly ignore my friends or any of the sort. When the time comes to give my friends a buzz I'll just do it. However, it's virtually impossible for me to give everyone in my contacts a buzz. Whether I call or do not call doesn't mean anything. My friends are still my friends. Sooner or later, I'll ask my friends out or buzz them.

Plus, why does it have to be me who's doing the contacting only?

Whenever I get home, I tend to keep to myself in my room and not talk much. I enjoy the quietness and collect my thoughts. Just enjoy the serenity. Hence part of the reason why I don't call often too. However, that doesn't mean I'll mind my friends calling when I'm home. I enjoy a good conversation like everyone else. I do try and chat up with all my friends online in MSN or GTalk. It's easier since I can multitask and it's free too!

So don't be dishearten if I've not contacted you for some time. I'm not avoiding you. It's just how things are with me.

You know you love me.
XOXO
Queer Ranter

iShove

I've been dying to own an iPhone 3G ever since it was released on 11 July 2008. I was willing to wait for it to come to Malaysian shores no matter how long it takes. But slowly, the iFanatic in me faded away. It started with Samsung Omnia and Samsung i8510 Innov8. They're lightyears ahead of iPhone in terms of functionality but I still kept my loyalty to iPhone. One it's Samsung. I'm no fan of Samsung phones. Two it's just not as pretty as an iPhone. So they got crossed in my list.

Then today while I was in the office, daydreaming and unfocused even though I had work to do, something abruptly interrupted my train of daydreaming thoughts of going back to KL. A mirage appeared in front of me. A poster ad of a handphone. Something that starts with 'X' and ends with 'ria'. SonyEricsson Xperia! I halted my work and went to Google it.

Lo and behold, I found my very own iKiller the SonyEricsson Xperia or also known as X1.

Xperia is Xtrodinary!

It's pretty, packed full with amazing functionality, 3 inch touchscreen (the sole reason why I like the iPhone to begin with), QWERTY keyboard, GPS navigation, WIFI enabled, 3.2 mega Pixel camera and more.

Ever since I got my first SE phone, K800i, I can't go back to Nokia or even think about changing to other phones. I love the SE interface, it's intuitive and user friendly. I do hope it's the same for the Xperia.

However, the estimated price in Malaysia, a hefty RM 3000. That's like buying myself a new laptop! I really need to test drive this phone if I'm buying it. RM 3000 isn't spare change for me. The phone better be expecting my expectations for RM 3000.

So off to reading reviews I go. I have an emotional need for a new phone with touchscreen.

You know you love me.
XOXO
Queer Ranter

Enough!

There's a big difference living offshore and living onshore. It's not offshore being middle of nowhere cause this city doesn't have much it might as well be in the middle of nowhere. It's the not-having-to-think-what-to-eat when I get back to the living quarters after a long, hard, sweaty day of work (and the laundry service is awesome too!). Even though the food isn't all that great and they tend to taste the same after awhile, it's something to eat. Not to mention, the fridge is always stocked with fruit juices and milk. Milk is bloody expensive here...

After two days of being onshore, I've had enough of thinking what to eat. Having five singles staying in a house, the fridge is rather empty and thinking where to eat out is such a chore. So I decided to make my favourite comfort food, Tuna Pasta Salad. Been ages since I cooked something and I miss cooking terribly!

So here's what you need.


I missed out the eggs.

It's really simple to do it. So simple in fact, I don't think it is considered as cooking. Boil the eggs and pasta. Dice the capsicum, celery and onion. Finely chop the garlic. Drain the corn, pea and tuna of their water and put everything into a mixing bowl. Add enough mayonaise to make it creamy. Add in some salt, pepper and dry Thyme. Mash the eggs once it is hard boiled and add it in. Mix them well and add in the pasta. Mix them again. Leave it in the fridge to chill. Some cheese would be awesome too.

Then tadaa. Ready to eat.


My lovely comfort food in a mug.

You know you love me.
XOXO
Queer Ranter

Bells Are Ringing

I love church bells. I would love to hear them for real like standing in front of a cathedral. Instead, I live in a country that has loudspeakers echoing signalling it's time for prayers five times a day. Anyhow, back to church bells. Everything about church bells has an allure of grandure and majestic. Just imagine when all of them ring in rhythm.

They sound like this.


Now imagine those bells ringing but it's ringing in your head. Well that's how I felt after my nap this afternoon. Endless ringing, throbbing and pounding in my head. This is why I try to avoid sleeping in the afternoon. Even power naps will give me a splitting headache. Worse still, I'll feel lethargic after the naps like how I'm feeling now.

I'm gonna make myself a drink. Ribena and Raspberry Vodka.

More Ribena or more Vodka?

You know you love me.
XOXO
Queer Ranter

Please Clean Up After...

It is always a good idea if not good manners to clean up after whatever you were doing. Especially crucial after both party has achieved orgasm and ejaculated. Cum stains are not good to soft and fluffy comforters. You'll have spots of hard cotton and somewhat yellowish stain. There goes your many thousands of thread count sheets and comforters. Not good. But I'm sure you all know that already. So no need for me to elaborate more.

Just as crucial and important to clean up after is surfing a net on a public computer. See what I found on this computer by simply clicking CTRL+V.

陳冠希bobo陳文媛影片流出e dison chen sexy video porn xxx

Yep, I kid you not. Imagine what else I would find if I searched through the history? Though I'll be thrilled if someone typed Fridae or Gay.com. I'll have the Spanish Inquisitors revived to hunt the guy down. Then again, there's not many who's my age or remotely close to my spectrum of guys... Still I would be curious to know.

Another discovery that I found was a hidden stash of porn in one of the drawers in the office here offshore and in one of the computer. Men at sea...

So whatever you do, do clean up after. It's good housekeeping practice.

You know you love me.
XOXO
Queer Ranter

Weird Men At Sea

Boys and boys. Think back to the time when you were a small boy. Young, innocent and uncorrupted by the world. Everything is all pretty and fluffy. Back to the time when you thought the penis is just for peeing. Remember what the boys used to do? I remember the boys in my school (especially primary school, an all boys school), they like to run around and grab each other's crotch. It is a game which the purposes or objectives are still a mystery to me but everyone was doing it.

I thought this "crotch grabbing" game was long gone along with my innocence. Then it suddenly resurfaced here, offshore! I was walking down the stairs with a guy in front of me and another guy walking up the stairs and there it happened. The guy walking up just extended his hands to crotch level of the guy in front of me. Though I don't recall the guy in front of me did anything. Not so much as a flinch but just walk on. I am certain the two aren't queer. So I guess the only other explanation is, they're all used to it?

Very puzzling... And it happened again with another guy. His hands are literally everywhere including my butt and back and hands (dejavu of the Pinoy marines?) and other guy's crotch. I'm sure my crotch is the only one that he hasn't felt or has it... It's nothing sexual I assure you but just that his hands are everywhere.

Still, I don't get what this "crotch grabbing" fascination or obsession. It's not like two jocks slapping each other's ass (I find this puzzling too) after a score. This was literally the "crotch grabbing" game from my childhood! Mind you, these people are all veterans as in average age of 40. They say old habits die hard and this is the proof of it.

Should I start wearing an Everlast chastity belt?

You know you love me.
XOXO
Queer Ranter

Men At Sea

Imagine and twist however you want to but this post has no relation to the famous porn Men At Play. I'm talking about the men at sea that I'm working with and have met in ships and platforms. And there's lots of them. It's expected really considering that it's 99.9999% men.

Remember I was talking about the Pinoy marine guys awhile back? Well there was more to just flirting. I think they were trying to figure out if I was queer by asking me a series of direct (more like bull heading) questions.

Have you had sex?

How many times?

Was it a boy or a girl?

Do you have a girlfriend?

Do you not like girls?

Of course I didn't tell them the truth. Just lie my way out of it. I was shocked that they asked me those questions so directly. It had to happen when I was enjoying a beautiful sun set. Lovely orange sun setting on the horizon and clear blue sky above it.

Then the next trip offshore, I checked into another ship that was around. Loads of activities going on in my oil field hence the ships. This time it was the cafeteria dude. I give smiles to virtually everyone I see on board the ship. I think it's just plain good manners to do so. Generally they smile back but this cafeteria dude went a step further. Winks. He gave me winks whenever he sees me. Winks! Disturbed as I may felt, I kept smiling.

Maybe I'm too nice...

Just as I thought these "Men At Sea" encounters were over, the technicians, it seems have been talking about me. And what were they talking about? The new technicians were trying to figure out who am I and they came out with "The Pretty Boy" to describe me.

Me? Pretty? Hmmm... Of all things. Pretty.

Perhaps it was the facial that I had before going offshore. Yes I know, what a waste of facial but I didn't know I was heading offshore so soon... I so need to do facial when I get back to shore. My pores are all clogged! AGAIN!

You know you love me.
XOXO
Queer Ranter

Bounty Of The Sea

Day ten of me being offshore and guess what excitement happened besides bumming around since there's totally nothing to do due to some technical problems. Food! Not just any food but food straight from the sea. Delicious, free and fresh. A flogger's wet dream.

It's a freaking huge ass lobster!

Yummy!

I have never seen such huge lobster in my life, let alone a live one. Never knew they are this colourful. Just look at the colour. So vibrant and bright. Looks like a spider. A very delicious spider. Hehehehe.

The guys decided to boil it and eat it just like that. Nothing fancy. We don't have a top notch kitchen on the platform you see. Just plain old dip the lobster into boiling hot water and eat. And boy, it was the best lobster ever! Extremely sweet and bursting with flavour. Just divine.

I've seen many sorts of fishes around the platform and they are huge and yummy! Turtles too. They stay around the platform for food and shelter. I've yet to see dolphins. There are somewhere apparently. It's almost like I work in Aquaria with all these marine animals.

You know you love me.
XOXO
Queer Ranter

GFan and iFan

Like it or not, we are surrounded by a myriad of brands. Everyday we are constantly bombarded by ads everywhere we go. Could be a person carrying a shopping bags with labels or the mere sight of an iPod earphone will remind you of Apple. Virtually everything that we use today will remind us of a certain brand and iPod made sure that happens with the colour white (and moving onto funky and eye catching colours) on their products.

Then few days back, GMail did something that I've been wanting, a facelift for GMail interface! Sure they're known for their simplicity and cleancut interface but a little colour here and there won't hurt. And they proved it with the new themes for GMail interface. I absolutely love my GMail now with the Graffiti theme.

Take a look.

GMail personalised!

Personally, I'm a simple and cleancut sort of person but the themes that GMail has introduced just blew my mind away. From the classic GMail themes with different colours to vibrant colours of Graffiti theme to even the classic computer neon green and black background interface theme. So I'm really liking my Graffiti theme. I'm just waiting for Google to do something awesome with their GTalk. Something like this perhaps and more functions of course. Webcam ability dem it!

Officially, now I'm a GFan and an iFan. I hearts Google and Apple.

You know you love me.
XOXO
Queer Ranter

OCD

I have an Obsessive Compulsive Disorder when it comes to gadgets. It's nothing major or annoying, just that it had to be perfect. Meticulous. You can say I'm the Bree Van De Kamp of Gadgetry Lane. My gadgets are all in almost perfect condition, inside and out.

Just today while attending a course my friend made a remark, "Gosh you're such an anal. Just look at your iPod's playlist, all well sorted with album covers." It's true. I don't download a single MP3, I need the whole album, organised and complete with album cover. I would take time to tag each song in iTunes and rank them too.


This also applies to the series that I download. All properly named and sorted. Except for my porn for some reason. I couldn't care less what they are named as long as I can find which that I want to watch.

How odd...

You know you love me.
XOXO
Queer Ranter

Curious Fact

You know the saying, "when it rains it pours"? I wonder if the same applies to men. How many of you have experienced this phenomenon?

I'm curious to know.

You know you love me.
XOXO
Queer Ranter

Lesson Learned

Coulda woulda and shoulda. Three words that have been ringing in my head for the whole day now. Carpe diem part of me seemed to slip and that one encounter gone wasted. I hate the feeling of kicking myself in the arse for not doing anything about it.

It was after clubbing in Market Place. It was a fantastic night with DJ Shigeki spinning. The music was sensational and I could hardly stopped myself from dancing. The DJ ended his session with club remix of Viva La Vida. We went wild with that. Perfect and best remix since Haji Seamus Touch My Body.

So back to the coulda woulda shoulda bit. We all went to mamak to sober up. Some of us were just wasted. There I spotted a guy I saw in Frangi's Friday night. It was a brief encounter in Frangi's but last night in mamak, he called me over. We introduced each other and he asked me to join them but I didn't since I was with the gang and I was a little intimidated with sitting in a table and everyone was literally staring at me.

When mamak session was over he and I chatted as we walked out of the mamak. Just general stuff about the night and the DJ. I could have asked for his contacts there and then but I didn't. Don't know why but urgh... Annoyance. It was obvious that both of us are interested with each other but nothing happened.

Bah...

Perhaps Facebook can be the silver lining to this dilemma?

Coulda woulda shoulda.

You know you love me.
XOXO
Queer Ranter

Series of Unfortunate Events

I'm sure most of you guys are familiar with Lemony Snicket's A Series of Unfortunate Events. Well I've not watched it myself but an unfortunate event did occur last night. A head on collision with another car.

I was sitting at the back of the car when the accident happened. Not sure what happened really but our Kelisa hit a Wira head on. It wasn't a high speed head on collision but enough to wreck the engine for both cars.


I'm not sure who's at fault, the Kelisa or the Wira. It happened at an intersection with traffic light. No one was badly injured in the accident so that's good. Though my sides and ribs are kinda sore. Silly me for not putting on my safety belt that night (I always do put them on though). I kinda landed at my sides on the back side of the front passenger seat.

So wear your safety belts people!

You know you love me.
XOXO
Queer Ranter

The Harbinger of Lusty Chaos

Hear ye hear ye,
Come gather round my sisters,
For I have a prophesy to tell,
Listen now and listen close.

Armageddon will come upon the slut's third nocturnal emission. He shall be known as the Harbinger of Lusty Chaos.

Now go my sisters and spread the word.

You know you love me.
XOXO
Queer Ranter

Jet Setting Lifestyle

I never thought that I'd experience a glimpse of a jet setter. All thanks to the back to back job trainings that I'm having. First was training in Singapore. My flight transited in KLIA. That was Sunday and the next day I was back in the office. Little did I know, my training that starts on Tuesday has been confirmed in Peninsular (travelling is expected here too...).

If only they told me earlier, I'd just stay in KL instead of flying back to KLIA again... Oh well, so long as I get to fly. Tired sure but I just love flying. I quickly settled my paperwork in the office and rushed back home to pack my clothes. Thank goodness I washed my clothes the night I arrived from Singapore or else I'd have nothing to wear. I over packed my luggage and it weighed 20 kg on the dot! Pheww!

The thing about having training is the food... They always feed us with good food. Normally this is a good thing but I'm trying to watch my figure here! I bought a lovely pair of black shorts from Fourskin in Singapore and it fits me just nice. No way I'm going to out grow my shorts! I love them too much.

Now that I'm back in KL for two weeks of training, I'm gonna enjoy my stay here at every chance I get. Shopping is a must! Clubbing is mandatory! And hanging out with my dear friends.

I'll be in KL till the 9th. Happy happy joy joy!

You know you love me.
XOXO
Queer Ranter

Somniloquism

Gosh, I remember back in the days I used tease La Twin Faghag about her unique ability to carry a conversation alone complete with Spanish drama expressions and flailing hands while sleeping. Pity La Faghag and her sleepless nights trying to decipher what La Twin Faghag was saying in Mandarin. La Faghag isn't exactly known for her linguistic abilities. Other things she's uncannily talented...

Anyhow, I've recently discovered I talk in my sleep few days back. My Vietnamese roommate said that he was awoken by my conversation(s). He said he couldn't identify the language that I was speaking in. I'm thinking possibly Mandarin since he can identify and distinguish English and Malay. I never knew my subconscious thinks in Mandarin. Weird actually since my mother tongue isn't Mandarin to begin with.

How odd.

I'm actually more interested in what I said. What got me all worked up to make me talk in my sleep. I'm thinking fatigue from all the trainings I've been attending. First Singapore and now Peninsular Malaysia. Gosh, I've got another training after this as well. Five weeks of training straight. I'll consider it a five weeks holiday of a sort. Hehehehe.

I do hope all these talking in my sleep ceases. Wouldn't want my straight Vietnamese roommate to find out I'm queer in the middle of my sleep. And before you ask, no he's not what I consider a cute Vietnamese boy. Actually he's not a boy, he's a man.

You know you love me.
XOXO
Queer Ranter

Victim of Label

It all started with a conversation with this budaks. I said, "I wanna get an LV wallet". He went on a hissing fits and rampage saying LV is so passe and plebeian these days. How the real thing and the fake are identical and such. Well fine...

Toss that out of the wish list. Then I went around the net looking for one.

Lo and behold, Ted Baker (I hearts the Internet). Yes I found my perfect wallet from Ted Baker. Radlow is it's name and at the oh so pretty price of £ 55. Hmmm. I almost got it online but the shipment fee is just horrendous! It costs £ 35 to have it delivered here!

Bastards!

Ah Ted, art thou a sight for sore eye.

Urgh. I just hope the branches in KL have it or I'll start screaming. Hell has no fury like a queer's scorn when it comes to shopping for pretty things. I am not going to pay £ 35 just to ship this lovely thing over here. I can get so many things with that money wasted.

So there. I have my sights set on you Radlow. Come to me you pretty little thing. Come into my pocket where you belong.

You know you love me.
XOXO
Queer Ranter

Trapped

Ever had the feeling that you're trapped? Not physically but emotionally. Well I feel trapped in a straight world especially where I am working now. I'm not referring to the office. I don't expect it to be a place I can fully express myself. Don't shit where you eat I say. Not having any queer friends and surrounded by only straight people can be very asphyxiating at times.

My trip down to Singapore reaffirmed this claim. I felt alive when I was there. I could be myself, loud and proud queer. It was so nice to be in the company of queer friends while enjoying a good meal together. Have walks down the street holding hands and laughing aloud with everyone minding their own business. Not to mention, everywhere you look there'll be a queer.

Sigh.

I miss my friends in Singapore and I miss my friends in KL even more. Modern technology can only bring them so close to me. Nothing can replace human touch and human interaction. Which is why I can't wait to see them next week. At least I know they won't ask me, "Do you have a girlfriend?" (I totally hate that question by the way). I'll start freaking out if my colleagues start to present their daugthers to me...

You know you love me.
XOXO
Queer Ranter

Singapore Singapore

Clubbing in Singapore is fantastic! Unlike Malaysia, people here party till it's 4 in the morning! An additional hour makes a whole lot of difference. We were partying in Play located at Tanjong Pagar. Gosh gotta love that place.

Being a Market Place addict, I have a certain standards when it comes to clubbing. This is primarily the reason why I don't go to straight clubs. Straight clubs don't have fun gay guys to dance with. Boobie dancing is a no no to me. The next is music. I heart DJ Fendie from Market Place. Nothing like a good dance music compilations for hours to dance with. The music in Play is inconsistent. Sucky tunes in the beginning but it got better as the night progresses. However, there were occasional weird music played in between.

Though I like the crowd. In fact, I absolutely love! Chinese boys all around! Heaven to me! And I love the way they dress up. Not to mention, most of them have the body to pull it off. Ah how I miss them Singaporean boys. It seems to me, white shorts seems to be a phenomenon when it comes to Singaporean boys. Almost everyone is wearing them. Sure they look hawt but I'm just curious about the obsession with it.

Speaking of boys, my list of crushes is growing... Exponentially I might add... This is not good. And this Singapore trip sure didn't help shortening the list. Urgh. I can't help it. I love my boys. Urgh.

The booze there is comparatively as pricey as Market Place (after conversion). A jug of Bourbon and Coke is SGD 60. Fortunately there was a special offer, two jugs for the price of one. Awesome! I did get a little drunk that night but then again, a little alcohol is enough to get me all giggle like a school girl. Heheheh.

You know you love me.
XOXO
Queer Ranter

Gadget Tart

Fool me once shame on me. Fool me twice shame on you. So I shall not pull the same trick again to blog about a little gadget I got here in Singapore. Meet the new 120 GB iPod! Me hearts my little iPod so much. Been dreaming of getting one since ages ago and here it is.

Another beauty of gadgets!

Just look at the colour! Lovely shade of dark grey and kinda matches my lovely laptop too. So slick, so smooth and entertainment wherever I go. When I got it, I immediately filled it up with my MP3s and Podcasts that I've been watching religiously, TedTalks. Real awesome stuff!

This is one of my favourite TedTalks.


Isn't she a fabulous storyteller?! But TedTalks is not a story telling gathering. Quite the opposite really. It's brilliant idea sharing session that they organise every year. Future technologies or ideas worth spreading are being told here. I am absolutely obsessed with TedTalks.

Final note, I heart Singapore~~~

Gotta do some more shopping before going back for work. Shall party all night long and be queer. It's amazing how liberating it feels to walk down the street and hold hands or perform PDA with another guy. I'm gonna miss this city.

You know you love me.
XOXO
Queer Ranter

New Found Boyfriend

I have a confession to make. I have been seeing someone ever since before I came to Miri. It wasn't really love at first sight when I saw his profile online but there was something that lured me to him. Something interesting that sparked my curiosity.

So I took a chance and thought what the heck. What's the worse that could happen right? And I agree on meeting him. Just to see how he is in person. It's one thing to know a person online and it's another to see them in person. To see is to believe sort of thing.

There he was all dressed up with such style. I have many girls envious of me having such stunning looking boyfriend. I'm just happy to have finally found the one. Lonely times no more and I am happy.

So here he is, Inspiron 1525 by Dell. My very first laptop.

Weee~~~

Ain't he a beauty?

With me being rather mobile with my work between office and offshore, this is a must to have. Kept me sane and entertained while I was offshore. Nothing to do on board a ship is enough to drive anyone nuts. I suppose there's always the Pinoy marines to keep me entertain if I so want to.

So readers, meet Inspiron 1525. My new found boyfriend.

You know you love me.
XOXO
Queer Ranter

Look Who's Back

Hello hello everyone. I know it's been like a month since I last updated. Busy with work and not having access to Internet connection is a bitch. My housemates and I are trying to get a broadband connection and install our wireless router. Guess it'll only be done after Raya. Bah annoyance.

Anyhow, as some of you know, I was offshore on an oil platform. It was fantastic and an eye opening experience for me. Just amazing to see how things work and how things finally made some sense. Following operation guys and get my hands dirty on hard steel and concrete. Tonnes of fun.

Sure I got seasick when I was on my way to the platform. Puked in the loo too. Urgh I felt like I was going to die and wanted to go back straight. But once I got used to the seasick, it was alright. In fact, it's lovely to sleep on a ship. The motion of the ship swaying rocked me to sleep every night.

Being on board a ship filled with men, you'd expect me to get some. Well I didn't but it was close. Not that close. Hahahha. Pinoy marine boys were hitting on me. Knowing me, I just keep smiling and laugh it off. That never stopped them from moving from verbal praises and flirts to "Lemme give you a shoulder massage, you look tired.". Temptation looms as they say.

That's all the update from me. Stay tune. Lots of things happened and I'm dying to tell you guys.

You know you love me.
XOXO
Queer Ranter

Of Dope, Pig and Fish

I've been busy reading on materials regarding oil wells and such. Loads to learn for a fresh graduate like me. I must say these people, whoever they are, sure come out with weird ass terminologies! I don't know whether to laugh or get frustrated when trying to imagine what it really is.

Take example, dope. Usually this is associated with drugs but not in this industry. Dope or doping refers to applying a layer of lubricant substances on a wire rope to prevent it from wear and tear. How interesting!

Then you have pig, fish and a whole lot of other animals yet to be discovered. Probably a whole animal kingdom awaits me. One thing good is, since it's so weird, it's easier for me to remember them anyways. Heheheh.

Thus far, I'm sorta enjoying what I'm doing. Lots to learn but fun at the same time. I can't wait to get my hands dirty working on the platform. That should be interesting and not to mention, allowance to earn! Woot woot!

You know you love me.
XOXO
Queer Ranter

What Lies Yonder My Office

Few days have passed and I realised I miss my skyscrapers. I can literally count with the fingers how many tall buildings there are here. The sky seems a little bare without the highrise buildings, reflective window panels or steel structures that are in KL.

KL oh KL.


This is what lies surrounding my office. Flat lands all around. That means the office is in the middle of NOWHERE! What is with me and places in the middle of nowhere... It's next to the coast but I don't think I'd swim or go suntanning there. The water is dirty and oil platforms are just right out there. Not exactly the Caribbean Islands.

Though really the weather is unpredictable, just like the weather out at sea. Blue sky in one moment and pitch black sky with torrential rains, gale winds and spectacular thunderstorms. But that's about it that's remotely interesting about this place. PMS-ish weather and flat lands.

You know you love me.
XOXO
Queer Ranter

So Where Am I Sitting?

Previously, cows will fly before you'll get me out of the bed at six in the morning. But now it seems cows are flying to the Moon because, believe it or not, I woke up at five thirty in the morning to get ready for work. They start work at seven thirty and our ride comes at seven. The sun rises early here and I intend to make full use of the free breakfast buffet as long as I'm staying in the hotel.

Practically three quarter of the day was spent on briefings. HR briefings (claims claims claims!), safety briefings, the company structure briefings and so on. It's true about this company keeping it's employees well fed because food and drinks were provided constantly! I really have to start watching what I eat now. I think I can save my money packing their food for lunch and dinner. There's always extra anyways.

Finally, I know what's my job title. I'm a Production Analyst. Sounds boring, nerdy and geeky huh? Well it's actually quite interesting (it could have been glamourous too...). Basically I'm a General Physician for oil wells., making sure that the oil keeps flowing out. I should have done medical and be a real General Physician instead... Oh well, I get to go offshore whenever I want to with the boss's permission of course.

My colleagues are wackos! Funny and noisy bunch of people. Quite the talker and quite the joker too kinda like during my internship. Though people in the company are generally friendly and love to chit chat and all. I guess it's true about what they say about Sabah and Sarawak people, they're friendly.

It was a good first day though I don't have a workstation to work in... I foresee I will be floating around for quite some time till they get it all sorted out for me...

Urgh...

You know you love me.
XOXO
Queer Ranter

To The Land of Hornbills

After two hours and fifteen minutes onboard a Boeing 737, the plane finally landed. It was ages since I flew with MAS airlines and I have to say it's so much more comfortable compared to AirAsia. But of course MAS airlines costs two to three times more. Well so long as the company is paying for it, I'm not complaining. I just wished it was a two way ticket.

I am doomed~~~

A total of nine of us were onboard and due to report for duty the very next day. The company sure don't waste much time. They even cut two days from my six remaining annual leave because of my convocation... Oh so cruel! Thank goodness it's towards the end of the year and I don't foresee any immediate need for it. Probably just bring it forward to next year. Gosh, such working class mindset!

Upon reaching the city (the airport's not all that far), it reminded me of Ipoh. Better or worse, I'm not sure but sure reminded me of Ipoh. So I guess it's not too bad. It's actually quite nice at first glance but I wonder if the food is any good.

We are placed in a 4 star hotel for two weeks while we look for a place to rent. Two single beds room each! So my parents get to stay in for free. How nice eh? We could have stayed in a 5 star hotel but I guess there's just too many of us. No worries, this place is nice enough for me and it's in the heart of town too.

I wonder what awaits for me in the office tomorrow. I hope the people there are nice, friendly and wacky. I'd just die if they're nerdy, geeky and boring... This place is quiet enough as it is... I still have no idea what I am going to do...

You know you love me.
XOXO
Queer Ranter

Wearing The Square Hat

The day that all under undergraduates have been waiting for, graduation day! I wasn't all that hyped up about it but was just feeling normal like any other day. But when I put on the the robe, hood and mortarboard, I was up in Seventh Heaven but at the same time in the Saharan Desert (I was drench in sweat from head to toe...).

I must say, I looked absolutely dashing in the outfit. The usual diva me couldn't help but stare at myself in any reflective surfaces I could fine. Vain I know. Hahahah. My parents splurged about RM 300 on photos alone. Three packages in total, one family, one solo and a few on stage shots. Such cutthroat prices! But I absolutely adore the solo photo of me. Just such a perfect shot.

The highlight of the day was walking up the stage and accepting the scroll. All that five years of rigorous torture for a piece of paper... The things people put value on sometimes are just ridiculous... Though the feeling that all eyes were on me witnessing my achievement was a fantastic feeling. One of a kind I'll say.

The Chancellor of my university is an ancient old Jurassic guy. I having this thought in my head that he might just passout right when I am about to take my scroll from him. Hahhaha. Silly I know but totally possible! I'll get my other five seconds of fame there from press coverage. Hahahha.

Five years of torture and few hours of awesome time. Totally worth it.

You know you love me.
XOXO
Queer Ranter

Tides of Change

My sincere apologies to my beloved readers for neglecting my blog for far too long of a time. Ever since the Bangkok trip, the drive to blog just dwindled. I go through phases such as these and my reading habits seemed to have followed suit. No matter, I'll get them back on track.

So what's new with the Queer Ranter?

For one, I'm now officially employed as most of you must have noticed my GTalk status. Now all grown up and a working man. I was rather surprised as I was expecting a few more months of bumming about in the house being jobless. Good news being employed but the not so good news is I'll be working in The Land of Hornbills, Sarawak. From one jungle to another.

Fantastic...

It's expected really. Just that it's hard to swallow the fact that I'm working there for few years at least. New place, new life and new friends. So Carrie Bradshaw in Paris. Kinda sad leaving my friends behind. Not just a road trip away but a flight across the South China Sea.

So for the past few weeks, I've been meeting up with friends, enjoy KL to the fullest, eat to my heart's delight with food in KL, absorb every bit of the queer nightlife scene (mainly Market Place) and window shopping in the malls. Oh how I'm going to miss KL.

So that will be my new adventure starting Monday, that's when I'm due to fly over.

Before that, Sunday is my convocation ceremony. Back to Notroh Woods for one last time. No more Pink Room. No more fabulous three. No more suppers with the gang. The good old days are just a memory now.

Next chapter of my life begins when I touch down in Sarawak.

You know you love me.
XOXO
Queer Ranter

And The Story Continues

Alexander The Gay decided that we should start a meme of a sort. Five sentences each starting with him. Interesting and let's see what happens by the end of this meme. Kinky story to come?

Alex:

It wasn't a dark and stormy night - that's really a clichéd beginning for a story. For Julien, it was bright enough to see the faint outline of Philip's naked body. Philip was sleeping soundly on the silk satin bedsheet, but Julien just couldn't even get his eyes closed on that full moon night. He was looking out the dusty windows, lightly holding the almost empty wine glass. Then, he caught a glimpse of a shadow... who was this stranger in the night?

Janvier:

Julien silently shut the window and kept in the shadows, to avoid being silhouetted in the moonlight. "Must get the job done quickly now," he thought while appreciating Philip's physique, "before he gets back." He downed the remains of the wine, then took out his garrotte.

Why do I always get the good-looking ones? he pondered as he got into bed, cradled Philip's head and slid the garrotte around Philip's neck. Then Julien yanked and Philip jerked awake, only to have Julien flip him facedown on the bed and pressed his body down on his, his face smothered by the pillow and Julien still strangling him, when the bedroom door slammed open.

Froggie:

Julien retreat off of the bed leaving Philip's lifeless body. Swiftly he reached for his shirt, knocking the wine glass off the side table. "What have you done?!!", a loud voice came from the door, "Not this one, not right here!!". Julien stood by the bed quiet as a mice, with his head hanging low. The light from the door shine into the dark room, as if spotlighted onto Philip's body while a shadow grew longer reaching the face of Philip.

Adrien:

But then it stopped. The creeping shadow halted, as if time stood still, and the approaching figures outside the door had frozen in place. Julien kept silent, his eyes and ears, vigilant, knowing that even the slightest of movements could trigger the shadows - the frozen figures that spoke of undesired calamity.

“For Hera’s sake, could you please keep that aside?! I strictly told you to refrain yourself from using the powerful one…Wait. He’s still in there. I can sense his energy. His fear. Even so, our beloved Phillip is far too devious to just play dead. Fine. Use it.”

It was a man, and he was not alone.

Bunny:

One of the men produced a verrrry suspicious-looking phallic instrument about 8 inches long which he flicked on. Brilliant white light shone forth from it to illuminate the scene at the bed but Julien wasn't anywhere in sight.

"I really wish you didn't bring that obscene looking flash light of yours here. Couldn't you be a little more serious about work?"

"Oh, don't bother about me and keep concentrating on finding him."

Lifebook:

"Just switch on light, dimwit!!"

Julien looked around him. Now he had to get a way out of the room, and it had to be quick before the guys found him. For the moment, jumping out from the windows was his only option.

After a minute of rummaging around, one of the guys managed to find the light switch.....

Me:

"I found it!" he said and flicked the switch but nothing happened. The light wouldn't turn on and both of them turned their attention to the faulty switch.

This was the diversion Julien has been waiting for. Swiftly, he sprinted fast and silently like a cat towards the opened window. It was freezing cold with winter winds but he had to get out of there.

Legolas is next!

You know you love me.
XOXO
Queer Ranter

Farewell Land of Smiles

Day four, my final hours in Bangkok. We left Bangkok on an afternoon flight back to KL. That leaves us with some time in the morning for more shopping. Even I could not help but buy a pair of undies from Hom and a manbag but enough of the Bangkok shopping post. There's something more to blog about Bangkok which were not written in the previous posts.

As everyone knows, Bangkok is infamous for their sex industry. Straight or gay, they have it. Just know which "dark" alley to go to and you'll find whatever that tickles your fancy. I personally have been to the gogo boys show and male-to-male massage in this trip.

I must admit, I've never seen so many engorged (not erected but super engorged!) penises in ONE night! Everyone of them were naked performing on stage as well as walking around to be hired by patrons. There was one act where five or so guys were standing on stage wanking and there will be a guy walking around with an empty bottle to collect "donations". Once any one of the guy on stage ejaculated, he gets whatever amount of money that had been collected.

Another eye opening experience was the male-to-male massage. Despite popular belief, not all of the masseurs are gay. It's just a form of another income to them. The whole thing started with choosing the package. There are two, the normal (ends with masturbation) and the extra (ends with sex). The massage itself is RM 60 while the tips to the masseur is RM 50 (masturbation) minimum or RM 100 (sex) minimum.

Once the package has been chosen, then it's on to choosing the masseur. They lined up on the other side of the room with a glass wall in between us. There they'll show off their assets and it's up to me to choose which. After that, it's up into the massage room. Before the massage, the masseur and I are required to shower first. He joined me in the showers, we lathered each other with soap and got to know each other a little.

The massage was a whole body massage. Started with me lying face down on the bed and ends with me lying on my back. He was alright with his hands but really excellent with his teasing. At any position that he's massaging me, he'll sure to tease me with his erected penis, making sure I know that he's erected. There even were moments that he was nearly in me. He finished the massage with me achieving climax.

Now with all those experience above, you'd think I must have been satisfied and thrilled. Quite the opposite really. After the massage, I was actually depressed. Depressed because the sex industry is really sad. Men parading around and selling themselves to earn a living. I'm not the sort to treat another person as just a sex object. I never can and never will. They're humans too.

When I got to know my masseur, he mentioned to me that a night he could get no clients at all or maybe one or two on a good day. Further more, the whole glass wall thing is like going to RSPCA and picking the right dog to adopt a pet. I felt really uncomfortable and unsettling. It was just down right inhumane.

Though I'm glad to have experienced it. At least now I know what the situation is like and most importantly don't judge but respect and treat them like any other human. They're just doing their work to earn money to survive. Just because they're servicing your sexual needs doesn't make them any less of a human than you.

With that, I bid Bangkok farewell.

Through the evening sky.

Till the next trip to Land of Smiles.

You know you love me.
XOXO
Queer Ranter