Quotes From The Minister

Malaysian Ministers sure are a funny bunch of people. Some say they are all talk and no action. Some say they talk cock. I say, some of them can't even talk...

Dato Sami Velu is famous/infamous for his inspiring speeches. I'll list down some of my favourite quotes from him. Such inspring quotes that can revolutionize the whole country! I kid you not.

Blood Donation Campaign

"mari kita sama-sama derma dara"

Lets donate our virgins

A simple letter 'H' makes a whole lot of difference. Dara = virgins. Darah = blood.

Public Appearance

"kemaluan saya besar"

I have a big package

Trying to say that he was ashamed of the incident that happened turned into a public announcement of how big his package is...

Election Campaign

"kita akan bina jambatan untuk orang-orang kampung di sini"

We will build a bridge here for the village folks

Ah finally some sense!

That is until someone said, we don't have a river here. Then he replied,

"kalau tak ade sungai, kita bina sungai!"
If there's no river, we'll build one!

Sigh... Seriously?!

Comment on Pos Laju (Express Delivery)

"besok kirim, hari ini sampai"
Post tomorrow, arrive today.

Does he have a time machine that we don't know of?

For more inspiring quotes, check out Sunshine & Limau Ais.

There's another quote that is still pending for authenticity at the moment regarding our astronauts. It is hilarious beyond anything he's said before. Shall keep you guys updated on that.

-Live Long & Prosper

9 comments:

William said...

Make a difference. Don't vote for idiots.

Alex said...

Wakakaka.... aiyoyo Samy.... bila mau bersara?

Queer Ranter said...

William: Problem is, the idiots are still voting for idiots.

Not to mention, who else is there to vote besides the idiots?

Alex: Heheheh. It'd be long before that comes.

-C said...

I have one to add.

When asked if the government planned to add CCTV cameras on highway on and off ramps to help curb the rampant hijacking of transport trucks, his response was:

'This is too much. Next they'll be asking us to wash their lorries for them.'

Found this and a huge list of other gems in The Things Malaysian Politicians Say, which you can browse (Oh Nik Aziz, when will you cease to be endlessly entertaining?) at your local Kino.

-C said...

Also on the transport trucks situation, my proposed solution is to hire Blackwater. Shoot first; ask questions later. If you're trying to stop a transport with millions of ringgit in cargo, even if you're wearing a uniform, something's up.

Jason said...

Waste money to bina sungai and then bina jambatan?

Stupid idiot.

Queer Ranter said...

C: I know that book. Love it. Heheh. Hilarious shit man!

Jason: I know... You wanna run for PM? :P

Aryaduta said...

Your Malaysian minister sounds a lot like my American president. :-P

President Bush is known to say the most ridiculous things. What's truly embarrassing is the fact that he doesn't even try to do it. He's just dumb!

"My job is a decision-making job, and as a result, I make a lot of decisions."

Dumb, dumb, dumb.

"I heard somebody say, 'Where's (Nelson) Mandela?' Well, Mandela's dead because Saddam killed all the Mandelas."

That's interesting because Nelson Mandela is still very much alive and kicking!

"Mr. Prime Minister, thank you for your introduction. Thank you for being such a fine host for the OPEC summit."

President Bush made this remark to Australian Prime Minister John Howard at the APEC summit.

We all have our idiotic politicians! :-P

chase said...

hahah.. really? the scene bout the package thing really happen?
hehehe.. wow. thats the first.