Bugger

What is queer really? The traditional meaning of queer is strange or unusual but these days, it is also used to describe gays. Funny how they associate queer with gay but that is how it is isn't it? People thing we are some sort of estrange being and naturally, human have a tendency of fearing strange things instead trying to understand it.

But that's not what I'm going to blog about today. I've already written about it in the past and there it shall remain. What I want to blog about is discrimination. Discrimination that occurs within the queer community itself. Even worst, discrimination also occurs within queer friends. That is a sad thing really. So much for depending on each other for support regardless of circumstances.

People judge. Everyone judge. I judge. We love to judge and compartmentalize people into categories that we see fit. It makes us feel empowered and good about ourselves. But at the expense of what? What is the price do we pay for doing that? If its the case of strangers, the price we pay is, we won't get to know the person for who they are really and not the assumptions that we make. That's relatively small price to pay compared to when people judge those who are considered friends. What would the price be for that?

Its really frustrating really cause you'd expect people would know better. Queers around the world are complaining about straights discriminating queers and yet, discrimination occurs within the queer community. Such an irony.

I'm tired these days, really tired. I'm tired of so many things that I can't seem to even begin to list it down. However there is one that stands out. I'm tired of being reminded of my own imperfections by others. I have me to remind myself of the imperfections I have and I don't need others to do so. I do a pretty darn good job of it myself, thank you very much. I don't understand what my imperfections have to do with them anyways. Its not like its life threatening to them that my imperfection exists in me. I'm imperfect in so many ways. SO WHAT?!

I thought I belong in a lasting relationship with McDave but that ended. I thought I belong with friends who sees beyond my imperfection but that did not happen. So where do I belong? Once again, I am cast into the sea of life without a clue where I am.

*Aretha Franklin - R.E.S.P.E.C.T. playing in the background

-Live Long & Prosper